One Sentence, by Craig.

A single sentence is nowhere near enough space to contain the words used to describe the way I feel about you, let alone the last two months with you, but one word can describe how I feel about this whole sissuwahsheeown: yes, absolutely yes.

A sentence by Lacey

This past month has been like a dream and I'm just waiting to wake-up any moment now, but I'm not going to wake-up and that makes me extremely happy, no ecstatic, no I'm head over heels in bliss; speaking of head over heels, that's what I am for you, I've never felt this way before and now that I have, I'm really glad these feelings are for you because you're my guy, and you always will be.

This is supposed to be one sentence without crazy run-ons, but obviously I broke the run-on rule... oh well ^_^

Trampoline

Lacey and Craig had just finished breakfast and were walking out of the bed and breakfast, ready for their next adventure. But when they stepped out the door they stopped in their tracks. Something was different about the rustic, yet quaint, country town.

“There’s something different about this rustic, yet quaint, country town,” Lacey said. Craig nodded in agreement. The strange thing was that Lacey couldn’t put her finger on what was different, in fact it looked exactly the same as when they left it. Yet there was something strange.

They stared at the town, pondering it for a while. “I’ve got it!” said Craig suddenly. “The entire town is moved two inched to the left.” Lacey was about to call him crazy and say that was definitely not it, but when she looked at the town, she realized he was right. Everything was shifted. “How did this happen?” Lacey asked. “Let’s find out,” he responded.

It didn’t take them long to figure out what was behind it. Behind the largest building in the town was hiding a giant crocodile. The crocodile was jumping up and down in this crazy jig which was causing the Earth to rattle and move the town to the left.

“What in the name of Steve Irwin is that crocodile doing?!” Craig asked baffled. “I have no idea,” Lacey responded.

“I could tell you,” said a voice behind them. “She’s doing the crocodile rock.” They turned around and were shocked to see Elton John himself. “That’s Suzy, me and her use to have so much fun, holding hands and skipping stones.” He explained, indicating the crocodile.

“Well can’t you get her to stop? She’s moving the town around.” Lacey pointed out. “No, I can’t. I don’t speak to Suzy anymore after she left me for some foreign guy.”

“Fine then, we’re going to leave, I don’t want to be here when Suzy destroys the town.” Craig announced, grabbing Lacey’s hand and pulling her away. “Where are we going to go?” Lacey whispered. “I don’t know, but we’re not staying here with that giant dancing crocodile.”

Lacey was watching a bunch of men paving the road up ahead and suddenly got an idea. She ran up ahead, over to them. “Where are you going?” Craig called, running after her.

“HEY! Men at work!” Lacey shouted. All the men paving the road turned to look at her. “Can you take us to the land down under?” They all looked at each other confused. “Good idea bumby,” Craig said under his breath.

The man in the middle walked up to Lacey, he had a nametag that said “Noodles.” He seemed to be the leader. “Are you sure you want to go to the land down under?” the two other men at work walked up too. Their names were “Porkchop” and “Salmon.”

“Yes, we’re sure,” Lacey said confidently.

“Well if you want to go, then you’ll have to eat this vegemite sandwich,” said Salmon. He held out two halves of a sandwich with vegemite in it. Lacey winced, like she wasn’t sure if it was worth it. “It’s worth it,” Craig said, reading her mind.

Lacey reached out for one of the sandwich halves, as Craig reached for the other. “This will take you straight to the land down under,” Noodles reassured. “Okay, let’s take a bite at the same time,” Craig said. Lacey nodded.

“One,”

“a 2hooooo!”

“CRUNCH!”

They both closed their eyes and took a bite.

When Craig opened his eyes, he was in the middle of a town, but it wasn’t the rustic, yet quaint, country town. It was a busy, yet friendly, bustling town. “We made it! We’re in Australia!” Lacey whooped. “This is awesome!” Craig shouted. They were jumping up and down in excitement for a while as passerby either gave them weird looks or walked in the opposite direction.

“Let’s explore!” Lacey said excitedly. They began walking down the street, site-seeing energetically. They noticed that there was the same flyer posted all over the city. It had an ambiguous person on it, but they weren’t close enough to read them. Both thinking the same thing at the same time, they walked up to the closest flyer. When they finally reached the flyer, they were surprised to see that they knew the person there.

“It’s Reggie!” Craig said flabbergasted. Below the picture of Reggie it said ‘Missing Person.’ “Reggie’s missing? How do people in Australia know he’s missing?”

“It says here that he fell in the snow and almost died. He disappeared shortly after that.” Lacey said, in an almost robotic voice.

“Let’s ask those people if they know anything about this,” Craig suggested.

“No way, they’re obviously Nazis!” Lacey warned.

“No Silly, they’re just swinging one arm fast and the other one slow, so it just looks like they’re Nazis.” Craig walked up to them with Lacey trailing behind. One of them looked just like Elton John, but he didn’t have any glasses and his hair was flipped up, so it obviously wasn’t him. The other three guys looked just like Noodles, Salmon and Porkchop, except they had glasses on and their hair was combed down, so it obviously wasn’t them. Behind them was a giant crocodile that looked like Suzy, but it was wearing glasses and a hat, so it was obviously a completely different crocodile.

“Do you Know anything about Reggie’s disappearance?” Craig asked.

“NO!” they all said really quickly, well the Crocodile kinda roared, but it sounded like a no.

“Uh, okay then,” Craig replied a little weirded out.

“DID YOU SAY SOMETHING ABOUT REGGIE’S DISAPPEARANCE?!?!?!” said a ridiculous voice behind them. They turned to look and see who it was, it was a very ridiculous man. He was covered in bullet wounds, yet he seemed to be completely unharmed whatsoever. He also had a dead Albanian person thrown over his shoulder. “I’ve been looking for him everywhere! I think Albanians stole it for human trafficking!”

“What? No! Not Reggie! Not human trafficking!” Craig said in despair.

“I KNOW! I’M GOING TO KILL A BUNCH OF PEOPLE TILL I FIND HIM!”

“Do you know where he—er she—er it might be?” Craig interrogated.

“I THINK THEY’RE KEEPING HIM IN THE WAREHOUSE AT THE END OF THE ROAD!” The ridiculous man said ridiculously.

Craig turned to Lacey, “Let’s go!”

“We’re coming too!” shouted the Elton John look alike, referring to his arm swinging buddies.

“ME TOO!” The ridiculous man screeched.

They marched down the road, to the warehouse.

“There it is!” shouted the Porkchop lookalike. They saw a large red warehouse, sitting there, practically waiting for them.

Craig walked in first, but the minute he put his feet on the ground, he was catapulted into the air and hit his head on the ceiling, which cause him to black out.

When Craig awoke, he felt disoriented. He began to move, but stopped when he heard a voice. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you, you’re sitting on a trampoline and if you move you’ll be thrown into the ceiling again.” Craig turned his head to see the Elton John, Noodles, Salmon, and Porkchop lookalikes walking over to him. Craig noticed he was on a trampoline and oddly there was a sink in the middle of it.

“Why aren’t you guys being jutted into the air, you guys are moving.”

“We have trampoline shoes on,” Said yet another voice. Craig turned to see Lacey across from him.

“Where did you get those, and can I have some?” Craig questioned.

“I’m afraid not, you see I have to come clean with you.” Lacey said in a serious tone. She walked over to the sink in the middle of the trampoline. “I believe this will clear things up a bit.” She picked up a toothbrush and toothpaste on the sink and prepared to brush her teeth. She brushed for a few minutes and then finally spit. Craig didn’t think this cleared anything up, but he waited patiently.

“Bring him here!” Lacey said in a commanding voice. The Noodles, Porkchop and Salmon lookalikes all picked him up and brought him over to the sink.

“GASP!” There was toothpaste left in the sink, this could only mean one thing. “You’re not Lacey! Lacey would never leave toothpaste in the sink! You’re setting her up!”

Imposter-Lacey nodded, almost a little sadly. The men at work lookalikes dropped him. They all removed their glasses and flipped their hair in the opposite direction. Then the Elton John lookalike put on a pair of small sunglasses and flipped his hair as well.

“GASP! You’re Elton John, Noodles, Salmon and Porkchop in disguise!”

“Yes, and here is my lovely girlfriend, even though I’m gay, Suzy,” Elton John added replying to the giant crocodile, who was standing next to the ridiculous man.

“I should have known! Well who are you really then?” Craig asked the ridiculous man.

“My identity is actually the truthful one, I really am a ridiculous man.” Craig wasn’t surprised, it was hard to fake ridiculousness like that.

“Well that only leaves you,” Craig said turning to imposter-Lacey. “Who are you really?”

Imposter Lacey took off her brown wig and dress, or maybe it was that she put a dress on….Craig couldn’t be sure.

“REGGIE! It was you all along! Why did you do this and what did you do with Lacey?!”

“Don’t worry, Lacey is perfectly safe in the next town, back at the bed and breakfast.”

“The next town? But we’re in Australia!” Craig pointed out.

“You see Craig, I’m going to make you pay. Everything that happened today was set up to fool you. I asked Elton John to bring Suzy to the rustic, yet quaint, country town so that she would cause a ruckus with the crocodile rock. That would make you want to leave. I had the men at work strategically placed so they would be at the perfect spot for me to see them. I asked them to go to the Land down under, but what you didn’t know is that your vegemite sandwich was drugged, so you actually passed out. While you were unconscious, we brought you to the next town, in order to make you think we were in Australia. We also posted flyers of me missing everywhere. I knew that you would want to find me, so I had that ridiculous man over there tell you to come here. And now here we are.”

Craig’s jaw dropped, it was all so intricately planned. “But why?”

“Well isn’t it obvious?” Reggie asked, acting as if Craig was the biggest idiot he ever met. “No, as a matter of fact, it isn’t.” Craig said in disbelief.

Reggie took something out of his pocket. “Look at this, Look at this!” He shoved the paper into Craig’s face. He had to move his head back to be able to read it properly. “This is a check for $3.”

“I bloody well know it’s a check for three dollars! This is my paycheck. Three measly dollars! How am I supposed to survive on this?” Reggie explained frustrated.

“Um… well that’s sad and all, but what does this have to do with me?” Craig asked confused.

“You didn’t pay for your cake! You didn’t even leave me a tip! You ate my cake, I waited on you and then you left without so much as a nickel! I’ve had people leave $300 dollars in return for my services. Now you’re going to pay! You won’t be able to get off this trampoline without knocking yourself out, I can keep you here all night. You might as well pay up now before I let the ridiculous man resort to brutal force.”

Craig looked around at everyone, he felt like he was in a nuthouse and all he wanted to do was get out of there and back to the real Lacey. “Okay, fine I’ll pay whatever you want, all you really had to do was ask, you didn’t have to go through all of this.”

“Don’t talk crazy Craig, of course I had to do all of this.” Reggie said simply. “Now pay!”

Craig went to reach for his wallet when he heard a loud popping noise. “Craig! Where have you been? I finally learned to appara—what’s going on here?” Lacey, the real Lacey, had just apparated into the room. (Veronica told me to add that she can apparate too)

“Ah, Lacey, I was not expecting this, well it doesn’t matter, your boyfriend here is going to pay and there’s nothing you can do about it.” Reggie said smugly.

“What did you kidnap him? Is that where he’s been all this time?!” Lacey said outraged.

“Indeed, I did, and he’s going to stay here till he pays!”

Lacey looked more angry than Craig had ever seen her. “How dare you!? I was worried sick!” Then Lacey performed some awesome trampoline kung fu moves that Craig had never seen before. She knocked everyone out in the room except Craig. Then she bent down and apparated both of them back to the bed and breakfast.

She turned to him, “So what was that all about?” She asked.

“You don’t want to know,” Craig said simply and bent down to give her a great big kiss.

Bird isn’t the word, the word is: seaweed

Cake.

Their week had been full of the makings of a very long week. It certainly could have been longer; afterall, they could have been apart from one another. So, really, it wasn't that long of a week. Well, maybe just a little long. How often were you attacked by an army of ants, turned green, confronted by The Terrifying BM, and subsequently lost your best talking, fur-covered companion to that same Terrifying BM? It was that long of a week.

Craig and Lacey strolled down the rustic, yet quaint, main street sidewalk of a small and rustic, yet quaint, country town. It was a pleasant evening for strolling; it felt almost like a Sunday evening, but the shoppes and eateries were still open and drawing fairly large crowds in this fairly small town, and Craig and Lacey had forgotten what day it was anyways. For the record, it was a Tuesday evening.

"I needed this," Craig said, breaking the long silence that had fallen between them. Lacey looked over at him and smiled agreeably. They both greatly missed Stanley and were lost in thought with what they would do next. Also, they were enamored with the rustic, yet quaint, charm that this small, country town possessed. Lacey let go of his hand and, instead, put her arm around the small of his back to cling to as they strolled. He put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer. As tough as it was to walk like this, both welcomed the snugness that the other offered.

Ahead of them, some of the shoppes were closing up, which meant shutting off the marquee lights and locking the front door. No gated or barricaded storefronts in this rustic, yet quaint, country town.

"Do you think we should turn around? I remember there was a bed and breakfast above the ice cream parlor I pointed out back there," Lacey offered.

Craig stopped walking and turned around, holding on tightly to Lacey so she'd turn with him. Most of the shoppes in that direction were still brightly lit. Turning back around quickly, they saw that only one marquee light remained lit. Turning back around once more, Lacey laughing, Craig shook his head. "Nope," Craig said as he swung Lacey and himself back around, "looks like we're going to..." He ran with her out into the empty street so they he could get a better view of the one lit-up sign. Lacey beat him to it. "Reggie's," she said, rolling her eyes at the irony of the name. "Beat you there," Craig shouted as he darted off. Lacey followed at a leisurely pace.

"What have I always told you, Craig?"

He stared at her blankly and shrugged, opening the door for her as she approached. "First is the worst, second is the be-" Lacey trailed off. A delicious aroma had caught her off guard, but that was nothing compared to the lavish decorations surrounding her. From outside, Reggie's was your traditional bakery, pastries and pies lining the display cases in the windows. "Are you seeing what I'm seeing?" Craig asked. "Everything's chocolate," Lacey replied in absolute wonderment. "Chocolate?" Craig asked. "Yeah, it's all chocolate." She breathed in the air, a heavy chocolatey scent swirling around her - she could almost taste it.

"I don't see chocolate," Craig said, "I see marble. Lots of marble, everything's marble. The countertops, the chairs, the clock, that cat... it's all marble." Lacey broke her captivated stare to look at him in a puzzled manner. Instead, she gasped. "GASP!" gasped Lacey. Craig jumped when he heard her gasp. Then, he looked at her to see what she was gasping about. "GASP," he gasped, although louder and in a much deeper voice than she had gasped. Lacey was marbled too.

"Welcome to Reggie's," a voice shouted from a back room behind the counter, "first timers, I'm guessing?"

Craig and Lacey took a moment to recover and then replied in unison, "uh huh." A man- no. A woman- umm, no. An androgynous person walked out of the back room and approached the counter. Besides the fact that neither Craig nor Lacey could tell the gender of this person, the person, wearing a name tag that read 'Reggie' was absolutely normal. Normal meaning that the person was neither completely chocolate nor completely marble. He... she... it pointed at two bar stools, obviously wanting them to sit. They cautiously obliged. "A slice of chocolate and a slice of marble for you, then?"

Craig and Lacey looked at each other and nodded. "Coming right up," Reggie shouted, disappearing into the back room again. Moments later, Reggie was back carrying two plates. The marble was placed in front of Lacey and the chocolate was placed in front of Craig. "Enjoy!" Reggie smiled enthusiastically and left the two of them alone once again to continue whatever he/she was doing in the back room.

Lacey eyed Craig's slice of chocolate cake. It was astonishingly beautiful for a piece of cake. The icing glistened and the sprinkles shimmered. Lacey's mouth watered.

Craig slid the plate towards her knowingly, exchanging it for her slice of marble cake. This slice also looked good, but he could see what Lacey saw in the chocolate cake - it really was beautiful. Lacey raised her fork and proceeded to take the first bite. She began to tremble slightly. A short, yet satisfied, moan escaped from her. Craig looked over in awe. "That good, huh?"

She laughed and nodded ecstatically. "I needed this," she said, taking another bite. Craig picked up his fork and speared a bite of spongy, yet soft-as-a-pillow, marble cake. This was easily the best piece of cake he had ever eaten, and it showed. He pulped a bright shade of crimson. Lacey was too involved with her cake to take notice.

Reggie came out from the back room and walked towards the front door. "How do you like it?"

Again, Craig and Lacey nodded, very satisfied with their cakes. "How did you know our cakes?" Craig asked. "You had marble eyes; she had chocolate eyes. I've been doing this for centuries; I guess you learn to recognize peoples' tastes." Reggie locked the door, then returned to the back room. It must have been past closing time.

They continued to eat and take in their surroundings, interrupting the sounds of chewing with the occasional "thi-ths-good" or "oh- oooh, mmmmm." Suddenly, Craig's fork fell to his near-empty plate. Lacey looked up.

"What's wrong?" Lacey asked. Craig sat frozen, his chocolatey complexion turning to white chocolate with fear. "Lacey..." he breathed deeply, "if we look like our favorite flavor, why does Reggie look like that?"

"Like wha-" Lacey dropped her fork too. Normal, human-looking Reggie walked out of the back room, "something the matter?" Craig and Lacey shook their heads quickly and picked up their forks, shoveling more cake into their mouths. Because their mouths were full, the explanations that followed were completely incomprehensible. Puzzled, Reggie disappeared again.

"We have to get out of here," Lacey demanded. "Yeah, let's move," Craig said, standing up and brushing the crumbs from his shirt. "Wait," Lacey took one last bite of her cake, put her hands over Craig's shoulders, and kissed him passionately. "Mmmm, what was that for?" Craig asked after finding his breath (she had taken it away with her kiss). "Just in case we don't..." She stared at him.

"What, do I have crumbs?" he asked. "No, your mouth, it's not chocolate," she answered. "Your lips are pink and not marbley anymore!" Craig whispered loudly. "You must have had crumbs then," she added. She took his hand and sat him back down on the bar stool. "Open up," she requested, scooping the last large bite of her chocolate cake onto her fork. "You too," he said, picking up the last morsel of marble cake between his thumb and pointer finger.

"Ah-one, ah-two-hoooo, ah-three."

On crunch, they tried one another's cake.

No longer was Craig and the rest of the shoppe made of chocolate. Lacey, the countertops, the chairs, the clock, and that cat weren't marbled anymore. Well, the cat and the countertops were still marbled, but that's just how the fur pattern went and that's just what Reggie wanted for the countertops. It still didn't look quite like a bakery, everything was still pretty lavish, but by the time Craig and Lacey had got up and let themselves out, neither of them cared what their surroundings were. They were both smitten with one another, and they had just had an incredible piece of cake. Reggie smiled as she walked to the door, locked it, and watched them walk back down the rustic, yet quaint, main street.

Craig held Lacey close as they strolled along. "So, bed and breakfast?" she asked. He stopped, turned her towards him, and kissed her like she had never been kissed before. She pulled away, wide-eyed and in need of breath (this time it was her breath that had been taken away). He squeezed her close to him and whispered into her ear "beat you there" before racing off.

Trampoline.

Moar betz!

Okay, most of these are from Monopoly matches.

• Luna has to try two foods of my choice and she has to enjoy them (haha, she doesn't really have to enjoy them, but we'll see what happens). COMPLETED, sorta.
  
• I have to hang upside-down so that Luna can give me a Spider-Man kiss and it has to be awesome. COMPLETED.
  
• Luna has to come up with a date that is semi-complicated or requires some effort in the planning process. Also, I get to to choose what she wears on this date.

Wow, why do I keep winning all of these? It must be the car piece bringing me luck.

EDIT: Luna also has to give me a thirty minute massage because, by some stroke of luck, I was able to throw a quarter into a jar from like six feet away. (COMPLETED) Also, I have to take a picture at Universal of me kissing Barney, and I have to set it as my Facebook profile picture for at least a month.

Bunk Bed

Craig had just finished fighting side by side with an aardvark to destroy an army of ants, and Lacey was very impressed.

“Let’s get out of here,” Lacey said, just in case another army of ants showed up. Craig agreed, and took Lacey’s hand as they began walking away. It was especially sunny out that day, and the grass looked greener than usual. It was almost as if someone took a bright green crayon and colored the grass themselves. Lacey turned to Craig to see if he noticed how green the grass was, but she found he was already looking at it.

“You noticed it too?” Lacey asked. Craig looked up a little surprised.

“Yeah, I thought I was imagining it. It’s not that I don’t like it, but why is the grass so dang green?” They both looked down at the unnaturally green grass and began to ponder what could have caused it.

“Maybe it’s not real grass, maybe someone put it here,” Lacey suggested.

Craig bent down and ripped off a blade and began to examine it. First he felt it, then he smelled it, and finally he put it in his mouth and chewed and swallowed it. “No, this has got to be grass, it tastes just like it.”

Lacey bent down and tasted a blade for herself. “You’re right, this has got to be grass.” She turned to look at Craig and fell back into the grass in shock. Craig’s skin was rapidly turning green, the same green color as the grass.

“You-you—”

“You’re GREEN!” Craig cut her off.

“What? No you’re green!” Lacey said in confusion. Both of them, realizing what the other had said, looked down at themselves to find that they both had unnaturally green skin. Lacey couldn’t believe it, all she could do was stare at Craig in wonderment. She was glad that at least Craig was still attractive with green skin, but she really didn’t expect anything less. When Lacey finally looked away from Craig she cried out in bewilderment.

The green was rapidly spreading. The tree barks were turning green, the lizards on the ground were green, a bunny rabbit hopping by was green. Everything was green except for the blue sky. “What’s going on?!” Lacey said frantically.

“I don’t know, but I’m going to find out!” Craig started walking foreword, with Lacey’s hand still in his. They had been walking for a little while, when Lacey got the feeling they were being followed, but every time she looked around there wasn’t anything there. She went a long time without looking, pretending like she had given up and then turned around quickly and very unexpectedly. Even Craig was a bit surprised and he looked at her curiously.

“AHA!” Lacey shouted. They were being followed, they were being followed by the aardvark! That wasn’t even the strangest part…. The aardvark wasn’t green!

Craig was now looking at the aardvark with his jaw dropped. “Why isn’t he green?!”

Lacey just shook her head, “Maybe the green didn’t get to him yet.”

“Maybe he’s a mirage,” Craig suggested.

“Maybe he has a special amulet on that deflects the green.”

“Maybe he’s an alien.”

“Maybe he’s not green, because he’s the one causing it.”

“Don’t be a sillyhead Lacey, I fought side by side with him, he wouldn’t betray us.”

“You’re right, what was I thinking? Maybe he’s a Greek god sent here to help us as an aardva—”

“Or maybe aardvarks are simply immune to the green.” Both Lacey and Craig jumped up in shock as they heard the aardvark talk.

“Did you just talk?!” Craig asked.

“Yes, what’s so surprising about that? It’s not strange that I’m an alien, but it is if I can talk?” Said the aardvark.

“Yes of course! Aardvark’s can’t talk!” Craig pointed out while Lacey nodded next to him.

“Well since you can talk, do you know anything about this green attack? And why doesn’t it affect you?” Lacey interrogated.

“This is being created by the terrifying BM—”

“Bowel movement?” Lacey questioned.

“No.”

“Boston Market?” Craig asked.
“No.”

“Bert Miller?”

“NO!”

“Boogie man?”

“No—yes, yes the boogie man.”

“See, I knew we’d get it eventually,” said Craig triumphantly. The aardvark was seething.

“So go on Mr. Aardvark—”

“Mr. Aardvark was my father’s name, call me Stanley.”

“Okay Stanley, why doesn’t this affect you? And why is ‘The Terrifying BM’ doing this?” Lacey said.

“The green doesn’t affect me because aardvarks are ‘the Terrifying BM’s’ arch nemesis, none of his powers work on us. He’s doing this because he thinks if the entire world is green then everyone will bow down to him because he’s the only purple one.”

“Well we got to stop him! Show us where he is,” Craig said determinedly.

“’The terrifying BM’ only lives under beds, so we must find the closest bed. Follow me.” Stanley explained, setting off towards the west.

It felt like Craig and Lacey had walked a hundred miles. They must have been walking through this unnaturally green sea of grass for at least five hours. Finally Stanley came to a halt and pointed up ahead with his long nose.

There in the middle of the grass was a large purple bunk bed. “That’s where ‘The Terrifying BM’ lives. Of course… genius. He picked a bunk bed because he can come outside, but still be under a bed, he would be under the top bunk. So that’s how he spread the green so quickly during the daytime, he never comes out from under a bed in the daytime. “ Stanley said more to himself than anyone.

Craig bravely walked up to the bunk bed and kicked it. “Hey BM! Come out and show yourself!” The bed started to rattle and shake violently. Craig took a step back, a little frightened now. Lacey walked up to Craig and took his hand and squeezed it.

“Oh no! You angered him! What were you thinking?!” Stanley cried.

Sure enough, a gigantic purple blob slid out from under the bed. Lacey couldn’t tell where his face was because he was too blobby, but he looked furious. He started for Craig and Lacey, making an angry slurping noise.

“Watch out!” Stanley yelled. Lacey pulled Craig out of the way in the nick of time. Stanley, like the hero that he was, jumped in front of them. “Alright BM, you asked for it!”

BM stopped in his tracks, then turned around to go back under his bed. “Oh no you don’t!” Stanley shouted. Just before BM went under the bottom bunk, Stanley jumped up onto his back….or wherever it was…. And went under with him.

There was a loud rumble, and then all of the sudden, the bed, BM and Stanley poofed into nothingness. Not long after, the many colors of the world came flooding back into existence.

Lacey and Craig barely noticed. They stood in shock, they didn’t know where the bed or Stanley went to, and they weren’t sure they would ever find out.

The moral of the story: Never buy a bunk bed!

You word is: cake

monthiversary letter to Craig

Well it’s our monthiversary and I really can’t stop thinking about you. But when I think about it, why would I stop? You are unlike any other person I’ve ever known: you’re funny, smart, extremely hot, compassionate, there is no ends to your awesomeness, you have the best smile, and you make me feel things I have never felt before.

When I signed up for plentyoffish, I had no idea that you would come out of it. I signed up thinking “what the hell, it’s not like it’s going to hurt me to try.” But, that day, on my very FIRST day no less, I came across this guy’s profile, which amused me so much, that I had to message him. Little did I know, that he happened to be on when I did this. Not long after, he IMed me through the website…. This is where it all began. On your profile you said your superpower was awesomeness, I now know that’s the whole truth.

I was thinking, I like you a lot, but you don’t know exactly what I like about you, so I decided that I would let you know. I like when you text me early in the morning so that I can read it when I wake up. I like how you always tell me that you like me, it never gets old. I like how you leave me awesome messages on purple pineapple. I like how you smile at my jokes, in fact, I like it when you just plain smile for anything. I like how you roll your eyes (it’s very sexy if you didn’t know). I like how you do crazy things for me, like dressing up as Luigi and dancing to TLC. I like it when you hold my hand, I like it when you hug me, and of course I like it when you kiss me. I like the way you smell. I like how thoughtful you are; always trying to make me feel special (you always succeed if you didn’t know). I like it when you tell me a story or tell me your problems. I like it when you show me cool videos and music, and I also like it when we just sit and talk. I like that there are so many things I like about you that I couldn’t possibly name them all.

I remember on your plentyoffish profile, one of the last things you said was, “I’m shy at first, but just start talking to me and ejdxijcwiodigj you’re in.” Well now that I’m in, (or at least I hope so) I have never been happier. You really are truly amazing. You made me happy before I even met you, before I even spoke to you on the phone. I would look forward to talking to you online every day. It really was the highlight of my day, and talking to you now still is. Sometimes you’re so awesome it feels like you’re not real. But you are! And I don’t know how I got so lucky!

When you held my hand in the movie theater that made me so happy, because that’s all I wanted to do the whole time. I remember you used your free hand to put on top of my hand, and I really liked that. I also remember, at the mall, when I put my hand in yours, how I could see you smile out of the corner of my eye.


You said that you were shy to kiss me in boomers, but honestly I would have loved it one way or another. I was waiting for it, I knew we had to kiss before you left, I just didn’t know when it would come. When we finally did kiss, as you said, sparks were flying. The kiss, although we may have been nervous, came so natural it was like we were meant to kiss each other. After we first kissed you said, “what does this make us?” I said that I didn’t know, but really I did, or at least I knew what I thought we were. I knew that there was something there, that we were going to be together.

You confessed what you did while I left to go to the lab, so it’s only fair that I confess what I did. When I walked into the lab, Veronica sat next to me to ask me what happened, so I told her what an awesome time I had. I also told her the story of how I tried to lose you in Macy’s and we ended up going opposite directions on the escalators. We both though that was funny. Then she asked me if I liked you, and I said that I did a lot. After that she asked me if we were going out now, I said that I didn’t know, but I was thinking: I hope so. I remember that I could barely pay attention to the lab, because you were all that I was thinking about. I’ll also add that my friend Judi said that you were cute; I thought you might like to hear that. I fully agree too.

When we first hugged that first day we met it felt like the perfect hug. You fit in my arms perfect and it wasn’t weird, or awkward or uncomfortable like usual. It was just the opposite, it was nice, and warm and so excellent that I didn’t want to let go. The more we hugged after that, the more I liked it. I like when you just hold me sometimes because it feels so nice to be in your arms. Whoops, there goes another thing I like about you.

I miss you so much Craig Pa. I think if I were to look into the mirror of Erised, I would see you with me. I don’t know what will happen when I finally see you, but I do know that it’s going to be spectacular.

I feel like there’s more I should write, but I don’t know what is. Maybe when I figure it out I’ll add it on.

I have to let you know that you’re my tangerine, my pussycat, my trampoline.
Like a whole, whole, whole lot,
Lacey